started respecting myself and everyone else started to respect me

Now ladies, what I’m about to tell you is some true shit. So true it might even jeopardize some relationships I’ve got going on lol but thats okay. There have been plenty of times when I’ve wanted to blog about something but I decided against it out of fear. I didn’t want to offend anyone. one day i shared these thoughts with a guy friend and he gave me some wise advice. I can’t remember exactly what he said but I think it went something like this “why you blogging if you gonna worry about what other people think about YOUR blog?” now that may seem like simple advice but to me it was like igniting the fire within. I still struggle with blogging because of this reason. However, I would consider a major breakthrough tonight with sharing this particularly story.

I know our parents and mentors are constantly giving us this “respect yourself” speech. I know it sounds like a bunch of old people yapping about what a lady signifies; making sure your dresses aren’t too short and your blouses aren’t too low. I get it now. Somehow, today I find myself at the other end of the spectrum. I chime in with the old ladies yapping “RESPECT YOURSELF RESPECT YOURSELF”. I mean, honestly, I’ve always stood by that value, but did I truly understand what I was talking about ? I mean really. I can preach all day about what a valuable Queen I am and the next minute I’m undervaluing myself by giving my time to a guy who makes no effort to attract it. Backwards shit. I hate backwards.

Basically with a turn of events I stopped giving guys discounts when it came to me. I started to become what most would consider “stuck up” or “bitchy”. At first i thought my “overly aggressive do as I say or get out my way” attitude would leave me single and lonely. Fast forward several months later and I’m still single but far from lonely. Literally, if I’m not working I’m on a date. I made a joke to my friends saying that I was gonna start making guys “book me”. My appearance didn’t change. My mind set did. I started to respect who I was and make no apologies. I realized that any man that was willing to accept me flaws and all would be head over heels. Which is what totally happened. Now I barely have time for even my friends. Sorry girls. I’m always on a damn date! With this new found respect and attention it feels good and maybe I over indulged. Who can really blame me tho? I went from being either stood up or asked on the worldly popular “chill”date. If it wasn’t the two I was stuck at home chatting with my girls over a glass of wine and talking about how niggas ain’t shit. LOL. when really the answer was within.

Am I wrong for going out on dates with five guys at one time ? Does that make me greedy? Absolutely not ! I’m 23 years old with my own everything. How the hell do you expect me to find my mate? Some are rich some are not some are hot some areeeeeee REALLY NICE but there is something in each of them that I admire and enjoy being around. Not to mention everything is free for me and my ego is pampered every minute that I’m with them.

MORAL OF THE STORY LADIES is that I didn’t switch my clothing preferences, change my look, gain some random fame, or switch social circles. I simply valued myself more than ever before. Guys started to recognize it and respect it. I don’t see why the same can’t happen for you. I just want to live in a world where women are looked at as Queens and men being kings honor the code of how to treat a woman. BUT before he can recognize a lady YOU must recognize it within first! Hope this helps. LOVE U ALL !


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my name is Tripoli. pronounced TRIP-AH-LEE. Growing up my mother always told me I could be whatever I wanted to be. I believed her, I still do.

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