I asked God to help me increase my blog entries by providing me with only real life experiences. I didn’t want to be that blogger who just talks about what sounds good to appeal to crowds. I want to be able to say I’ve been through it so that it’ll sound more relatable. I know plenty of people who write about the “hard knock life” without actually living it. It can be done but those stories lack emotion. Emotions that can be felt through each word written, emotions that are easy to be identified with because that reader has felt that same emotion. I want my readers to have that connection with my blog. Lets just say I keep it real, all the way real. If I haven’t lived it I ain’t writing about it.

So lately I’ve been going through the motions of losing friends. I mean we all lose friends but in the past two weeks I’ve let go of a couple, distanced myself from a few more in hopes of them just forgetting me altogether, and called a few out on bullshit. It needed to be done but it had me feeling kind of down. I felt like I was the common denominator in all the situations, which meant that it had to be my fault. How is it that in just a couple months I literally go from a group of maybe ten good girlfriends to now only three?

I sat down and had a talk with my counselor about the situation and she helped me reason and see exactly why I was losing so many friends so soon. It’s called GROWTH people! Yes it all makes sense now. Since 2015 I can honestly say I’m learning more about who I am as a woman. I’m accepting this path that I’m on because I chose it. That comes with the loss of friends. DUH! Think about it, your mom is hopefully a fully established woman. She has her own home, career, and family. Now go count her girlfriends, coworkers not included but her actual real best friends. Well my mom has one. I can definitely see how she got to that point. It is impossible for me to remain friends with girl who I was a friend with when I was lost and naïve. They were lost and naïve too. Finding myself means that I’m not the same girl I was neither are they. So unless we aspire to be like each other, which would be weird, it’s inevitable that we will have different interest as we mature.

IMG_2131 What I thought was the evil of the world separating me from girls I grew to love was actually the universe preparing me for the next level of my life. My mom always told me friendships are like elevators. We all will enter on the first floor; some may ride with you to the fifth maybe some will even go to the fifteenth. However, everyone is not going to the penthouse. So when it is their time to exit the elevator let them exit because if you don’t you will only delay your journey to the penthouse. Let them off that elevator and keep going.

If you’re still friends with those same chicks from high school just know you’re not growing honey. I can understand keeping one friend from high school. Keeping two friends is pushing it. If there are more than three you are being stagnant in some area of your life. God doesn’t intend for us to all hold hands and sing kumbaya forever. Most people that enter your life will only be there temporarily. Find the lesson God sent them to deliver and move on with your life. It’s time to connect with your inner you. Live out your potential and keep moving on up that elevator. Not everyone you lose is a loss.

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my name is Tripoli. pronounced TRIP-AH-LEE. Growing up my mother always told me I could be whatever I wanted to be. I believed her, I still do.

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