Today at 25 looking back at all the failed love attempts that I had to live through makes me cringe. I use to think it was the guys fault, like I was such a great catch and they were the blame. As I grow wiser I realize how wrong I was. It wasn’t them, it was me. I ruined my relationships. I was to blame. That’s not to say that I want any of my exes back. Oh no! I am a firm believer that what happened was suppose to happen. I learned valuable lessons from them all, so thank you.
This isn’t about them, its about me. If I could tell 20 year old Tripoli what 25 year old Tripoli knows I would have saved myself a lot of heartbreak. However, I can’t, but I can share the secret with you darlings. If you want to make a man love you, you must…………
LOVE YOURSELF !
Straight like that. I use to think it would make a man love me to bend over backwards for him. It won’t. If anything it shows him that you are second in both of your lives. He will only follow your footsteps. My mother once told me “you teach people how to treat you”. How can you teach a person to read if you can’t read ? It’s the same thing with love. Ever notice how the one you want doesn’t want you and the one that wants you is the one you don’t want. Its a cycle of cat and mouse games. I say lets put an end to all the games just by simply loving yourself more. So yes I do take full responsibility for my failed relationships. My significant other at the time was only following my direction. Had I loved me more he would loved me more too.
Now what does it mean to love yourself first in a relationship? It means that when he’s hungry but you’re tired make his ass order take out and you eat it then go to sleep. If he wants you to stay home while he goes to party you make sure you put on your sexiest dress and go party; make sure you leave first too. If he’s being an ass go ghost on him for a few hours or a few days. Let him blow your phone up. You come first your happiness is everything !
No more do I have the problem of making a man love and respect me. I have a problem of getting guys to leave me alone actually. It’s because I love myself so much that when a man comes along he gets jealous of the bond that I have with myself. He wants to be apart of it… and he can. As long as he realizes that I come first.
Love yourself first Ladies.